I have to say adoption wasn’t our plan “A, B, or C.” I read somewhere that it is actually part of the grieving process for couples who are “deemed” infertile by modern medicine. But as I reflect on this journey my husband and I are on, grief is the last thing we feel. He’s 41 and I just turned 38. We are in the best stage of our life span, our marriage is rock solid, our professional lives are respectively sound, we maintain a healthy network of family and friends so grief isn’t part of our vocabulary. We aren’t perfect but we are in a good place.
We are moving forward with international adoption and unlike other adoption blogs that I have seen where everything is laid bare for curious eyes, I want to keep this close to my heart. It’s akin to a woman who is secretly marveling at the flutters in her womb unbeknownst to others. Adoptive parents go through what’s called “paper pregnancy” where you spend a great deal amount of time reading, researching, signing forms, emailing, etc.
It’s the early stages yet and any adoption process (whether domestic or international) can take up to two years to complete.
I have my “Forever Family” camp rooting me on. It’s a motley crew of people who God has thrown our way. They span two countries, several walks of life, and some have never met each other. They give sound advice, research and email me things, and most importantly, they pray.
Someone recently texted that they wish they could do more. And for those who know me well enough, the most you can really do is not ask or make redundant questions/statements like “when are you bringing him/her home?” or my personal favorite “now you’ll get pregnant.” And if am not saying anything–it’s really because I have nothing to share. So please don’t take it personal when am not baring my heart and soul via Facebook, WordPress, or in person. I know who to share what with and I discern why I am sharing it too.
Spring is blooming for many mommies to be–myself included!! Yep, I am including myself in that mental transition where Fridays after work isn’t spent in a department store looking for yet another pair of shoes (cause you know that’s my weakness.) I recently spent my Friday evening sitting on the floor at a Craigslist seller’s home, talking about mommy hood and our plans to adopt; buying up all her child’s books, toys, and clothes to send to Haiti.
This is all new to me and I want to savor these thoughts for me and God to hash out together.
For those who genuinely pray and hold us in their heart, thanks in advance for your prayers. Specifically AGAINST bureaucratic strongholds. Specifically FOR finances and God’s ultra-perfect timing.
I am not on Facebook as I used to be cause priorities are shifting and this year’s fast shed some clarity on this. But I value the meaningful relationships I have on there. So will keep you posted on Word Press from time to time as we move on with our forever family journey.
Remember silence isn’t lack of progress, rather it is God taking the lead as He takes the wheel.